Its so amazing…….the love and bond between me and my 4 babies….
Before I was a mother, I always told my mother I knew just how much she loved me, I guess because I felt such a deep love for her, and still do, a love so deep that is so indescribable, but I know now that I had no idea. What I feel as a mother to these most amazing little human beings is so amazing, a love so deep and strong that at any moment it can bring me to tears. Tears of joy, fear, and happiness. They themselves bring me such joy by just being mine and loving me. I know they love me, and I know this because of the way they need me, look at me, dislike my boundaries, but desire them all at the same time, the way they hug me and can make me smile in moments of sadness or frustration. I say fear because of the world we live in, and also feeling that my heart walks outside my body, in each one of them. For this I feel what they feel, the sadness, happiness, fears within them, the struggles of life, physical and emotional. As a mother it is very hard to watch or hear those things that we too have experiences in our own youth, and I know I just want to make the world around them perfect, shelter them, but also know it is not possible to make it all perfect. They are my happiness. I take great pride in the fact that I carried them in my belly, and nurture their every need, and seeing them thrive, grow and become amazing children, makes me happy. I see that at times I am there happiness. That makes my heart smile. The big hugs after a few hours at school, or me at work, the smiles of a newborn at 3 a.m., the soft sounds as I feed my child, or the big kisses, and the quiet cuddles on the couch. This to me is happiness.
Love between my babies and I cannot be measured, and or cannot be put into words, it is just the most amazing thing. I am so grateful to be a mother, mother to these most amazing little ones, and for that I will count my blessings each and everyday.